{"id":11329,"date":"2026-07-22T07:12:02","date_gmt":"2026-07-22T14:12:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/?p=9931"},"modified":"2026-07-22T07:12:02","modified_gmt":"2026-07-22T14:12:02","slug":"faculty-meeting","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/faculty-meeting\/","title":{"rendered":"Faculty Meeting"},"content":{"rendered":"<!-- wp:themify-builder\/canvas \/-->\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The wino took to a coma like I do when a faculty meeting begins.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The solution was therefore hydrochloric acid with a heavy chance of staining.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I daydreamed (when the fucking phones weren\u2019t going off)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">of the color gray walking the plank into a neon pink sea.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I heard a gunshot!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A blunderbuss took out the coaches table.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">No intellectual loss for sure.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Now the football coach&#8217;s wife wouldn&#8217;t have<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">to slip off her top in my classroom<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">before the bell rang.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">We get to go steady<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">and fuck before church.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Is this a nursing home?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If it is, then it\u2019s child\u2019s play.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I composed 17 synonyms for the word <em>loathing<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">and wanted to roll myself like boulders of dice into the ocean.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The wino took to a coma like I do when a faculty meeting begins. The solution was therefore hydrochloric acid with a heavy chance of staining. I daydreamed (when the fucking phones weren\u2019t going off) of the color gray walking the plank into a neon pink sea. I heard a gunshot! A blunderbuss took out [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":9932,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[10,16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-11329","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-meditations","category-poetry","has-post-title","has-post-date","has-post-category","has-post-tag","has-post-comment","has-post-author",""],"builder_content":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11329","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11329"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11329\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11329"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11329"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nestuccaspitpress.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11329"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}