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A Blog by Matt Love
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September 2, 2020

A Note on the Road

Matt Love NSP Meditations

Texas. New York. Utah. Louisiana. Just some of the many out-of-state plates I’ve seen on all manner of vehicles at beach waysides on the Oregon Coast. Vans. Buses. Sedans. RVS. Trucks. More than a few come complete with makeshift living quarters mounted on the rigs. I even saw a hearse retrofitted as a a camping vessel of some kind.

I wonder when it will let up. I wonder if rain is the cure, real hard core November rain that makes it difficult and uncomfortable to do anything outside. I have felt like talking to some of these travelers, and then I don’t.

It is morning. I am writing this from a picnic table overlooking the ocean. Some pelicans just undulated over the waves. In the sky, contrails and smoke from the California fires.

I started another fort today, just after dawn. On my walk back from the beach, I picked up a handwritten note on yellow legal paper along the road and read it. Someone was making a budget for how they might survive for the rest of 2020 and a list of where they might live. It seems like they are bouncing around. It was a remarkable historical document of the diaspora going on. I normally retain these kind of writing artifacts, but not this one. I unfolded it and left the note flat on the ground in the shoulder where others might choose to read it and reflect.

September 1, 2020

Oregon Tavern Age: Detox

Matt Love NSP Meditations, Oregon Tavern Age

My cousin was suffering from an ongoing nervous breakdown. He was drinking too much, way too much, and his personal and professional life were in tatters. He knew he had to act for the sake of his three children and his life. His therapist recommended a total detox, meaning five days in a facility where you dry out, nothing else. Upon his release, he would check into a rehab program and try to get the help he needed.

Detox was worse than anything you can imagine he told me by phone a few days after his release. He said it was worse than One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest. At least in the movie they had puzzles with all the pieces and a deck of cards with all 52 cards. He had forgotten to bring anything to read because he wasn’t a reader. But a while back, he had purchased Oregon Tavern Age from me (he’s in one of the stories) and knew the time was right to read it all the way through. His first book in years. He had his son retrieve it from his house, and he read the whole damn book in detox in bed next to a maniac coming off meth.

Yes, the obvious irony of reading a book full of stories about people drinking (sometimes too much) while in detox was easy pickens to laugh about and we did. I asked him if reading the book helped him in any way. He screamed his response: “HELL YES! IT MADE ME LAUGH.”

My cousin told me that laughter saved him as it did me a few years ago when I was at my lowest moment.

He’s checking into rehab on Thursday for a month. I’ll be writing him letters and sending books.

August 31, 2020

Corona Virus Thoughts #13

Matt Love Corona Virus Thoughts, NSP Meditations

I caught thirty seconds of a high school football game in Alabama. Astonishing. Half the people in the stands weren’t wearing masks of social distancing. In Oregon, all fall high school sports are postponed (probably canceled). Why the difference between the states? Alabama is different because it wasn’t crushed after the Civil War and the racist ruling class was allowed to remain in place and NOT suffer for its treason. Had the work of Reconstruction continued, and it was working, America would be a totally transformed nation. But it wasn’t and look where we are.

I keep feeding a crow with a broken wing who hangs out in the parking lot of the grocery store where I shop. I need to name this bird.

My chipmunk buddy is AWOL. I miss him. We were friends for well over a year.

Another member of my family has cracked (somewhat) because of the strain of living in the Pandemic. It wasn’t the Pandemic itself, just the extra pressure that comes from isolation and the terrible, selfish, arrogant behavior exhibited by many Americans.

I grow weary of conspiracy theories about the Pandemic from both the left and right. What has happened to us?

More strange people along 101. The latest: a man proclaiming the end of the world with a sign on his grocery cart and another man on a suicide prevention mission, or so the sign read on his wheeled contraption.

While driving home, I saw a case of large cans labeled Pork Products on a sidewalk. The ancient graphic design indicated they contents was most likely well beyond expiration date. I drove back around to see it up close an hour later, and all the cans were gone.

I saw a peregrine falcon atop a Sitka spruce. I heard its distinct call and watched it for ten minutes.

The guitar man emerged from the willows again, a few mornings ago, accompanied by the same strange tweaker woman. (See photo) He asked me if I had smokes. I told him I did not. He was wearing a long black coat right out of Johnny Cash. This is the fourth time I have seen the man. He has never actually played the guitar.

The Western is finished and ready to be sent out. Does anyone want to read a Western right now? The writing I am doing right now feels futile at times, but I forge ahead with this project, because there is nothing else to do. I really have no idea what to write next.

I am going to apply for writing instructor position inside a correctional institution. I still have something to give with my teaching life, and someone who found this blog has reached out to me and encouraged me to apply, and provided a sterling recommendation.

Speaking of the blog, I close in on 1000 posts since it launched in April 2017. At times I thought it was coming to an end, such as in recent weeks. I really have no idea who is reading it anymore, if anyone really is. But then I hear from a reader and something magical happens. If you are out there, let me know. I sense my number of posts to the blog will decline in the coming weeks or months, but one never knows. Whenever the blog seems to be dead, it takes another direction, one that I did not foresee.

Such is life.

August 30, 2020

A Stroll Through My Forts

Matt Love Driftwood Forts, NSP Meditations

I thought my readers might enjoy this short video of my complex of forts. There are eight or nine here and they might last until the season’s first big storm. I have written a lot in my notebooks while sitting on driftlogs inside the complex, which is something new to me. Building these forts has helped relieve stress during these terrible times and kept me fit.

August 29, 2020

On Vortex I in 1970 by Nicholas von Hoffman

Matt Love NSP Meditations, Oregon Coast_History

(I will wrap up my look back at Vortex I with a column written by someone who attended the festival. Of all the pieces I read about the event, this was the best one and pretty much right on the mark.)

The Washington Post, Monday, August 31, 1970–A Poster column by Nicholas von Hoffman

Two Legions In Portland

Portland, Ore., Aug. 26—It was BC—Before Chicago—when the chamber of commerce invited the American Legion to its 52nd annual convention here this week. In the meantime, a lot of bloody political history was made on the streets of other cities so that, as the Legion prepared to arrive, Portland began to suffer hysterics.

Stories in the underground press suggested it might be mellow to have a counter convention, and there was much apprehensive talk of thousands of long-haired savages coming to trash this pleasant, middle-sized metropolis where the forests from the surrounding mountains penetrate to the verge of downtown.

It was a frightening prospect—mobs of Yippies and other mobs of drunken Legionnaires meeting each other under hotel canopies. The impending mess seemed to finalize itself into inevitability with the formation of the People’s Army Jamboree, a chaotic, counter-convention group of uncertain purpose, amorphously led by a rotating cast of young people who think the world is on an ego trip and so all call themselves coordinators. On the other side, Terry Schrunk, the mayor of Portland, issued a special, unwelcome visitors brochure entitled “Peace has its price in Portland.”

Decorated with doves, this insulting piece of literature informs the youthful tourist that any activity other than quiet, rhythmic breathing is illegal here. “If you are poking around somewhere and a police officer thinks you look suspicious, he might stop you…the law says he can…When three or more of you are getting a mite more fractious than necessary, you will probably be told by a police officer to disperse. He is not doing that to just hear his good, rich baritone nor yours…We don’t like unpleasantries. The city code, section 14.28.010 spells that out…So we suggest that you take any threatening behavior and unreasonable loud noises somewhere else. Like the wide open spaces.”\

Chicago seemed to be repeating itself in the Pacific Northwest. There were the same arguments over parade permits and permission to use the parks to sleep in. The only difference was that here a group of worried citizens, composed of a few younger and less vehement politicals and a smattering of liberal Republicans, interposed themselves to work out a way of securing public order and free expression.

They had some success because the People’s Army Jamboree backed off sounding bellicose, and the authorities relented. Two parade permits were granted, permission was given to camp in one of the parks, and then Gov. Tom McCall made McIver State Park, near here, available for a rock festival which got itself named Vortex I. It was announced that the stare police and young people would share the chore of policing this diversionary gathering, which is to continue until the legion is safely out of town next Thursday. The Portland area disc jockeys began talking the thing up, and it soon became apparent that the drug laws would be suspended at McIver.

The jamboree, seeing young people clear out of town under a combination of the threat of tough police action and the pull of free music and dope in the woods, has been screaming “cooptation!” Bribery might be a more fitting word. The governor’s office denies supplying the dope or the money for the music, but the free festival is certainly being put on with every kind of encouragement from the authorities. There is even a rumor going around that McCall has a National Guard helicopter loaded with rose petals to be dump on the 20,000-plus people floating around the vortex if they remained stoned, tranquilized and cooperatively absent from the city for a few more days.

The corporal’s guard of politicals remaining here in Portland is sending what it calls affinity groups out to McIver to plead with people to put their clothes back on and make a little less love and a wee bit more war. Runners also have been dispatched across the nearby border into the state of Washington to the Sky River Rock Festival, but the music, dope and scenery here appear to have greater appeal. The multitudes are staying put.

There still can be trouble in Portland. There’s no defense against the lone dynamiter or act of terrorism by a small group. The day before yesterday, three White Panthers were arrested for having a sawed-off shotgun and a couple of M-1s. With so much press here, a couple of broken windows or a few wild punches may create the impression that a lot of bad stuff is happening.

Even so, Portland could come to be regarded as a model for other places and situations. That would be a mistake. Tough talk and procrastination with parade permits doesn’t always cut down the size of the crowd as the Washington moratorium last fall showed; an alternative rock festival wouldn’t have averted Chicago; finagling with dope enforcement is too transparent and ineffective because people in large numbers can safely smoke it anywhere and are as likely to at a demonstration as at a rock festival.

The mood here is wrong for massive manifestations. The country is too beautiful, the Oregonians too polite and civilized, the Legionnaires too well behaved to irritate their would-be opponents. Excluding a few incidents, there will be peace in Portland, First Amendment rights will be protected. Thanks to some benign manipulation by public officials and a happy conjunction of the stars, we will have gotten over another hump, but hump jumping isn’t the same as problem solving.

August 28, 2020

Letter to Governor McCall in Praise of Vortex

Matt Love NSP Meditations, Oregon Coast_History

(What follows is an extraordinary letter written to Governor McCall in the aftermath of Vortex I.)

Mt. Angel College

Mt. Angel, Oregon 97362

(code 503) 845-2234

September 3, 1970

Dear Governor McCall,

You may recall that I wrote to you in support of your decision to open McIver Park to Vortex I and to offer my services in a counseling capacity to the youngsters attending the festival.

It is, I suppose reflective of my academic background to feel a compulsion to make a “report” of my experiences there.

I would like to tell you about . . .

Don, the ex-convict medic who went four days without sleep attending the emergency first aid needs of all who came;

Kim, the veterinarian’s assistant who set a broken toe and mother three little boys who appeared late one night;

Stu, the medical student who slept for a few hours and then only because of his 102 fever;

Whitey, the motorcycle gang leader who ran escort for emergency vehicles night and day;

Mark, who walked the rounds of the park each day bandaging cuts;

The endless round of people who came to offer their help at the first-aid center.

I would like to tell you about the absolute absence of litter in the park; of the cleanliness of the outdoor toilets; of the care taken with the campfires.

I would like to tell you of the pride in the voices of the Oregon youths as they told out-of-staters that their state and their governor were in support of the festival.

I suppose, too, that I would tell you about the drugs and the bad experiences many suffered from them. I might even have to mention a certain degree of informality in dress on the part of many.

Some bad things did happen . . but by and large, it was a good experience for most. It might be best summed up by a remark I overheard as I made the rounds early one morning; a young man said to another, “I think you did that on purpose, brother; but I’m here to love everyone, so I won’t kick the shit out of you.” And indeed there was a good spirit of love, of sharing, of friendliness, and of good times in the park.

The people there did not feel that they had sold out but rather that their way of love and kindness was more appealing and more genuine than the spirit of confrontation and violence suggested by some.

In future I would suggest that more careful consideration be given to the scheduled staffing of the first-aid center–there might be an R.N. on duty all the time, and to the staffing of the psychological services.

As far as I know, I was the only one there in the latter capacity. The drug overdoses were given over to my care which of necessity was minimal. I would suggest in future events one might solicit volunteer hours from counselors, social workers, psychiatric interns, etc. to help with this aspect of the work.

Traffic control, food service, camp cleanliness, and water safety were all [sic] taken care of by volunteer staff. The state police were of great assistance in the traffic control and were well thought of by those who worked with them.

I think that your decision to open the park to the festival and to lend it your official support was a wise one. I am sure that you will receive an endless amount of criticism in this regard, and would suggest that you not let it bother you . . . Vortex was a good thing.

I deeply appreciate your acceptance of my offer of help. If another such festival is ever in the works I would like to be a part of it again.

In the meantime, if there is anything that I can do to lend you support in your work with the youth of the state, I hope that you will feel free to call upon me.

Sincerely,

Thomas P. Sullivan, Ph.D.

Dean of Students

«‹ 155 156 157 158›»

Teacher of the Year: A Novella

By Matt Love

A reluctant teacher becomes advisor to a moribund high school newspaper. He meets the new editor, a dynamic 18-year-old senior, and together they begin a unique creative collaboration that revives the publication and slowly slides into gray areas. As the poet Octavio Paz wrote, “To realize itself, love must violate the rules of our world...committed by two stars that break out of the conception of love, which implies breaking away and a catastrophe..."

Teacher of the Year
Amazon's Kindle Edition $6.99

Teacher of the Year unfolds in an energetic mixture of epistle, stream-of-consciousness, narrative and meditations on the craft and alchemy of teaching. There is no other more authentic literary exploration into the agonies and ecstasies of teaching in the annals of American literature than this novella.


A Substantial but Incomplete Autobiography in Poems

By Matt Love

In perhaps the largest, most eclectic volume of previously unpublished poetry in the history of Pacific Northwest literature, Matt Love presents 148 poems written over a 30-year span.

As he writes in the introduction to A Substantial but Incomplete Autobiography in Poems, “I have organized this collection into six categories: Ocean, Love, My Life, Oregon Tavern Age, Homelessness, Probation. These poems serve as a substantial but incomplete autobiography.”

“Confessionals, odes, scatological doggerel, polemics, tankas, haiku, prose, psalms, requiems, observations, love letters, lamentations, lyrics, stream of consciousness, meditations, lists, riffs, a eulogy, a sermon, a commencement speech, found poetry, tributes, elegies. I threw it all into an ancient cement mixer and hand cranked that concrete beast while watching blue herons undulate overhead and drinking red wine as the husky snoozed in his dirt fort. The result: A Substantial but Incomplete Autobiography in Poems, something merging where Charles Bukowski, Richard Hugo, Mary Oliver and Liz Phair blend together.”

None of Love's poems were ever submitted to poetry journals, contests or magazines, making this collection a true renegade project of passion and readable to any denizen of a coastal dive bar.

A Substantial but Incomplete Autobiography in Poems

Print Edition

$21.99 + $4 Shipping


Amazon's Kindle Edition $7.99 (Free if you have Kindle Unlimited)

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