Nestucca Spit Press Meditations Blog
A Blog by Matt Love
  • Home
  • About
  • NSP Categories
    • NSP Meditations
    • Lost and Found
    • Writing
    • Driftwood Forts
    • Oregon Beaches
    • Of Walking in Rain
    • Oregon Coast_History
    • NSP Correspondents
    • Oregon Tavern Age
    • Astoria
    • Fiction
    • Poetry
  • Back to NSP
  • Contact
RSS
January 17, 2026

Morgan from New Zealand

Matt Love Coos Bay, NSP Meditations

“I’m from New Zealand,” said Morgan.

“New Zealand!” I said.

“Yeah, I’m a Kiwi.”

A homeless man in his 70s named Morgan had just told me where he hailed from. He had been a regular presence in my Coos Bay neighborhood of Empire ever since I’d moved here seven months ago. We had held multiple, brief, pleasant conversations and Morgan was a big fan of Elmer the husky. In fact, we had introduced ourselves early on, and Morgan would always call out my name and Elmer’s when we walked past him.

New Zealand!

In all our previous conversations, I had never detected any accent, but then again, Morgan had no teeth and was sometimes difficult to understand.

But as soon as he said “Kiwi” I heard the accent. And the more Morgan talked the more pronounced it became.

It was 7:30 on a weekday morning and Morgan sat on the sidewalk, under an awning of non profit organization that serves the developmentally disabled. He often sleeps there when it rains. He was drinking a can of malt liquor. His possessions amounted to one small backpack resting on the ground. Everywhere around Morgan was tidy. He never left a trace after spending the night.

I had vowed at some point to ask Morgan his story of homelessness and for some reason, this morning was the time.

In due course, I learned Morgan had been living on the streets for ten years and residing in the United States since the late 80s. He was a tourist in LA, missed his flight home, and never returned. He worked construction in California and Arizona for many years. I asked him how in the world he came to live in Coos Bay. He laughed and said, “That’s a long story.” Doubtless, I’ll hear it one day. How could I not? A homeless man from New Zealand ends up in Coos Bay?

I asked Morgan if he had any desire to get into housing.

“I think I’ve been doing this for too long,” he said.

I asked him if police hassled him. He said one cop gave him an MRE for a Christmas present and another one threatened to jail him. Why the stark difference?

“They’re just two different people,” said Morgan.

A younger homeless man crossed the street and came up to us. He was wearing an all red, mismatched ensemble and bedecked with gold chains. A classic 90s white rapper look. He smiled and asked if he could pet Elmer because Elmer was so handsome. I said of course! Elmer dug that 90s white rapper look as much as I did.

I didn’t have any cash on me or I would have given Morgan a few bucks. Perhaps next time when we meet.

Elmer and I said our goodbyes and walked away. Behind me, I heard the two homeless men talking about my dog.

January 12, 2026

Empire Meditations

Matt Love Coos Bay, NSP Meditations

I am beginning my seventh month in Coos Bay, in a neighborhood known as Empire, which used to be a city until 1965 when residents voted to join Coos Bay. Sixty years later, that might have been a mistake,

Empire continues to fascinate me. There exists a level of miscreant behavior by some of the people in the neighborhood that defies everything I thought I knew about rural Oregon miscreant behavior.

A stray dog has started appearing at the back fence. He’s a husky/shepherd mix wearing a collar. He looks healthy. I’ve fed him a couple of times and he and Elmer bark and howl at each other through the boards. If he returns regularly I’m cutting a hole in the fence and inviting him over. If Elmer and the stray get along, I may have a new dog.

My one significant New Year’s resolution is to better avail myself of what Coos Bay has to offer as far as culture goes. I’ve got to see more of what’s out there: art shows, live music, new restaurants. To that point, I will be attending a production of Hamlet staged in a nearby bakery/restaurant/gift shop. I haven’t seen a live Shakespearean play in over 30 years.

I dearly wish there was an open mic poetry scene in town. It still surprises me one doesn’t exist.

An idea for a book about Empire has started to coalesce in my mind. It involves a tremendous amount of research (not online), which I love doing, but I would like to hire a researcher for $25 an hour. Working title: Juxtaposition of Empires.

I plan on putting in a large garden this spring and sharing the bounty with the non miscreant neighbors.

The terrible physical condition of many Coos Bay residents continues to shock me. I’ve seen broken bodies that I’ve never seen before or thought possible to break in such a grotesque manner. This place is nothing less than a public health and public education disaster with no end in sight. I write this with the utmost sympathy for these people. They must be suffering.

An entrepreneur opened a tiny video store in Empire that sells used DVDs and games. A video store! This is the only new business that has opened since I moved here in May.

Every weekday morning, Elmer and I walk past kids waiting in the darkness for the school bus. They are always on their phones. Will these kids ever develop an interior life outside of phone and the internet as they grow up? I saw the same thing in Portland, too. At those bus stops, a half dozen kids would be waiting for the bus and every one of them was using a phone. They never talked to one another. They never had a moment to think outside what was playing on their phones. And every second they are fiddling on their phones, their lives are being commercialized for obscene profit by the most powerful and amoral corporations in American history, and that’s saying something.

But…there is perhaps a ray of hope in Empire. Elmer and I often take different routes on our morning walks. There is one kid, a boy probably in eighth grade or so, a little portly, who is waiting for the bus AND IS NEVER ON HIS PHONE. He always greets me and says what a great looking dog Elmer is. He wears a fedora (!) and something like a man’s wool Pendleton jacket from the 70s. That makes me smile. I wish a good day at school and leave him to stand there, thinking. I wonder how he’ll turn out.

January 9, 2026

Teacher of the Year Novella Released

Matt Love Fiction, NSP Meditations, Writing fiction, matt love, nestucca spit press, novella, teaching novel

Readers:

I have published a new e-novella called Teacher of the Year. The bulk of it was written in 2011 and I recently cut 45,000 words to complete this final form. It’s available through Amazon at

Nestucca Spit Press will feature Teacher of the Year on its website this spring. A print version may be ready by then as well.

As always thanks for supporting my writing and an independent Oregon publisher.

Summary of the book is below:

A reluctant teacher becomes advisor to a moribund high school newspaper. He meets the new editor, a dynamic 18-year-old senior, and together they begin a unique creative collaboration that revives the publication and slowly slides into gray areas. As the poet Octavio Paz wrote, “To realize itself, love must violate the rules of our world…committed by two stars that break out of the conception of love, which implies breaking away and a catastrophe…”

Teacher of the Year unfolds in an energetic mixture of epistle, stream-of-consciousness, narrative and meditations on the craft and alchemy of teaching. There is no other more authentic literary exploration into the agonies and ecstasies of teaching in the annals of American literature than this novella.

January 7, 2026

John Dellenback Trail

Matt Love NSP Meditations, Oregon Beaches

Elmer and I pulled off Highway 101 into the parking lot of the John Dellenback Trail near Lakeside. Destination: the towering and sweeping dunes one must traverse to reach the ocean. It was a sunny weekday in early winter.

I’d never seen this place before and relished watching Elmer run wild in this dunescape. A new adventure for us. We keep racking them up.

As we exited the car, I noticed a pile of belongings, including a piece of rolling luggage in a decommissioned camp site.

There was simply no way this pile could represent the possessions of a homeless person in this remote area of the Southern Oregon Coast. Impossible. Someone must have dumped the pile for some perfectly rational or inexplicable reason and driven away.

The pile moved! I saw the back of a head with matted hair nod.

There was simply no way it could be a homeless person in this remote area of the Southern Oregon Coast.

I stopped myself: I’d seen homeless people in much more remote places in Oregon than this. (Agness, Oregon for one.) And at least this parking lot had restrooms and water.

Elmer tugged on the leash. He was raring to go.

We explored the dunes, and let me say for the record here: this is a must see for every Oregonian. We were extras on the set of Lawrence of Arabia for an interminable David Lean long shot. Elmer went bonkers in the sand, running amok, running around me. I chased him and we both fell every now and then and rolled down a dune. It was the happiest I’d felt since my dad died.

We returned to the parking lot 90 minutes later, exhausted.

The pile remained and the head still nodded. A park ranger drove past the pile.

I decided an investigation was warranted. We would cruise by the pile on our way out of the parking lot.

Minutes later, I idled the car 20 feet behind the pile. The body turned my direction. It was a woman in her 50s or 60s. She was playing on her phone. I powered down the passenger side window to ask if she needed help. She glanced at me, registered nothing in her face, turned slowly around, and back to her phone.

A hundred questions combusted in my mind. I’d asked the same ones a thousand times since writing about the homeless in Oregon.

I’ve probably answered a half dozen of them.

January 5, 2026

Herschel and the Impressionist Sunrise

Matt Love Coos Bay, NSP Meditations

A purple and orange haze of sunrise in December greeted Elmer and me as we walked south along a stretch of Coos Bay beach adjacent to the Empire Boat Ramp.

Placid water mirrored purple and orange. Elmer and I reflected purple and orange in the mudflats. Have you ever seen a purple and orange reflection of yourself in a mudflat? It is something cosmic to behold.

In the distance, across a creek that emptied into the bay, I saw the familiar blue tent pitched on riprap three feet away from a barbed wire fence. It was the most inhospitable place to camp but had a $5 million dollar view of the estuary.

The tent appeared every other week or so, but hadn’t stood when a recent king tide walloped the riprap and flooded the nearby encampment.

Who was this camper? I occasionally saw him standing outside the tent, urinating and perhaps mediating. It is possible to both at the same time, particularly in nature, particularly when nature is purple and orange.

This particular morning, the man had climbed down the 20 feet of riprap and was standing on the beach near the creek. I watched him for a spell. He moved in a strange nodding manner reminiscent of someone high on fentanyl.

Jesus! Not this Impressionist morning. You can’t have a homeless fentanyl user in the foreground of an Impressionist landscape.

Or can you? I should ask a painter. I know a few good ones.

Elmer and I moved closer to the man. It didn’t appear he noticed us. We were now 30 yards away from one another, separated by the creek.

The man was not high on fentanyl. He was fishing! Yeah, put that in Impressionist landscape!

He was wielding a kid’s fishing pole and casting into the creek. He knew how to cast, that was for certain.

“Hey!” I called out. “Good morning! What are your fishing for?”

“Good morning to you,” he said. “I don’t know. I’m just fishing.”

“If you catch something, do you cook it up at your camp.”

“No, I always catch and release. I want to give back to the bay.”

A homeless man in Coos Bay with nothing said that to me. I’ll remember that line and this sunrise for the rest of my life.

We discussed the beauty of the moment. He spoke in unconscious haiku about it. Then it was time to leave.

“Have a great day,” I said. “My name is Matt.”

“You too!” he said. “My name is Herschel.”

Elmer and I walked away. The sunrise was fading into a soft blue. I took a quick glance backward. Herschel was was on the move, casting upstream.

December 31, 2025

Christmastime Ruminations

Matt Love NSP Meditations

I took down all the Christmas decorations before the New Year. I’ll replant the two Doug firs I rescued from a clearcut that served as my indoor and outdoor Christmas trees in the back yard. I wonder how tall they will be when I leave this house.

My first Christmas in Coos Bay. Very uneventful personally for me, but I did better connect to my new city and some of the people and organizations trying to do important work. I don’t know if I have what it takes to make any significant impact here. Maybe those days are.

Elmer and I continue our beach adventures and I’ve recently met some interesting locals and tourists for brief conversation and interactions with their dogs. One in particular stands out: an alfalfa farmer from Christmas Valley who is residing in the area for a month during the holiday season to care for his elderly mother. He said it was absolutely essential for him to walk on the beach with his German shepherd every morning to get his head and heart straight to deliver that care. I told him I knew something about that.

I’ve also seen my fair share of solo tourists, all women, who are at the beach, meandering, staring at the ocean, obviously contemplating, and probably experiencing some type of crisis. I’ve seen this same sort of thing ever since I moved to the Oregon Coast in 1997. It’s usually a woman in her 40s or 50s. I suppose they have traveled to the ocean for some answers, or perhaps to generate some questions to ask. On several occasions I’ve had the opportunity to talk with them. It’s always the same story: the city sucks, my career is bullshit, I’ve got to change.

I have released a new novella called Teacher of the Year. It’s an e-book available on Amazon. The first 60,000-word version of this book was written in 2011-12 in the throes of an agonizing breakup with my then photographer girlfriend who was lying to me for months.

A month ago, I reread it and cut it down to 17 thousand words and vastly improved the story on different levels. I may bring out a print version later. It was fascinating to read the old version and see how I’ve improved as a writer of fiction.

I’ve been reading a 1962 biography of William Randolph Hearst. The parallels between him and Donald Trump are incredible. They are almost the same person. If Hearst had had television like Trump did, he would have become President. All he had were newspapers (penny press) and even though in many ways they were arguably as bad as the internet has become today, they still weren’t the visual medium.

What will happen to me in Coos Bay in 2026? My country? I’ve been thinking about those questions a lot in recent months.

«‹ 21 22 23 24›»

Teacher of the Year: A Novella

By Matt Love

A reluctant teacher becomes advisor to a moribund high school newspaper. He meets the new editor, a dynamic 18-year-old senior, and together they begin a unique creative collaboration that revives the publication and slowly slides into gray areas. As the poet Octavio Paz wrote, “To realize itself, love must violate the rules of our world...committed by two stars that break out of the conception of love, which implies breaking away and a catastrophe..."

Teacher of the Year
Amazon's Kindle Edition $6.99

Teacher of the Year unfolds in an energetic mixture of epistle, stream-of-consciousness, narrative and meditations on the craft and alchemy of teaching. There is no other more authentic literary exploration into the agonies and ecstasies of teaching in the annals of American literature than this novella.


A Substantial but Incomplete Autobiography in Poems

By Matt Love

In perhaps the largest, most eclectic volume of previously unpublished poetry in the history of Pacific Northwest literature, Matt Love presents 148 poems written over a 30-year span.

As he writes in the introduction to A Substantial but Incomplete Autobiography in Poems, “I have organized this collection into six categories: Ocean, Love, My Life, Oregon Tavern Age, Homelessness, Probation. These poems serve as a substantial but incomplete autobiography.”

“Confessionals, odes, scatological doggerel, polemics, tankas, haiku, prose, psalms, requiems, observations, love letters, lamentations, lyrics, stream of consciousness, meditations, lists, riffs, a eulogy, a sermon, a commencement speech, found poetry, tributes, elegies. I threw it all into an ancient cement mixer and hand cranked that concrete beast while watching blue herons undulate overhead and drinking red wine as the husky snoozed in his dirt fort. The result: A Substantial but Incomplete Autobiography in Poems, something merging where Charles Bukowski, Richard Hugo, Mary Oliver and Liz Phair blend together.”

None of Love's poems were ever submitted to poetry journals, contests or magazines, making this collection a true renegade project of passion and readable to any denizen of a coastal dive bar.

Amazon's Kindle Edition $7.99 (Free if you have Kindle Unlimited)

Recent Posts

  • Eulogy for Mark
  • Mark Leavenworth RIP
  • Roast Ruminations
  • Stand Em’in the Corner
  • Fasting Ruminations

Categories

  • Astoria
  • Bonnie and Clyde Files
  • Coos Bay
  • Corona Virus Thoughts
  • Driftwood Forts
  • Fiction
  • Lost and Found
  • NSP Correspondents
  • NSP Meditations
  • Of Walking in Rain
  • Oregon Beaches
  • Oregon Coast_History
  • Oregon Tavern Age
  • Pioneer Pride
  • Poetry
  • secret coast radio
  • Sports
  • Writing

↑

© Nestucca Spit Press Meditations Blog 2026
Powered by WordPress • Themify WordPress Themes