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November 3, 2025

“The Free Walking Chili Pie Dinner”

Matt Love NSP Meditations

On Halloween, the Reedsport Church of God hosted and event called, “The Free Walking Chili Pie Dinner.”

I did not attend but should have. There is a great American novel in that event, a weird American novel of fitness and flatulence.

Some questions about the event?

Is there a prayer before you eat a slice of chili pie and then start walking around Reedsport on Halloween?

Do they sing hymns as they eat and walk? If so, which ones?

Can you speak in tongues while eating a chili pie?

How long is the walk?

What does one wear?

Is there a collection plate at the finish line?

Who conceived of such an event?

Are the chili pies homemade or processed food garbage? These are Christians goddammit! They make chili pies from scratch just like they make their Ritz cracker crumble, tuna and green bean casseroles from scratch for the Sunday potlucks or the memorial services.

How could I have missed this event? The incontinence and sermonizing I might have witnessed could have unlocked the secrets to understanding America’s deep and destructive cultural divide.

And if I had gone, would there have been a vegetarian option?

October 31, 2025

Empire Homeless Halloween

Matt Love NSP Meditations halloween

The tale’s premise: there exist certain homeless people in Oregon who celebrate Halloween, decorate, dress up, hand out candy to trick or treaters or even trick or treat themselves.

A preposterous premise conjured by a deluded, sentimental writer who counts Halloween as his second least favorite American celebration?

No. The writer of this tale has observed homeless people in Oregon for years decorate themselves, their tents, RVs, sedans, bicycles, boats and dogs for Christmas. He also served a homeless man in an Oregon City street mission who told him he always cooked a turkey at Thanksgiving in a garbage ban buried in a charcoal pit and staged a feast for the residents of his encampment on the banks of the Clackamas River.

So why not Halloween? Many people prefer Halloween to Thanksgiving or Christmas. You know, pagan over Squanto and Santa Claus. And, at Halloween you get to consciously pretend to be someone far more interesting than your real self. Moreover, you don’t have to fake it with the relatives at dinner.

On with the tale.

Morgan lived with two dogs (and occasionally a loser man) in a 32-year-old black Honda Accord that was battered, bruised, duct taped, caulked, tarped, and generally held together with baling wire, bungee cords and the expertise offered by a retired 80-year-old auto mechanic, Hank. He met Morgan in the parking lot of a grocery store when the Honda crapped out yet again. He got it running in 20 minutes, tutored her on solving the reoccurring problem, and became her regular mechanic out of the sheer goodness of his heart and because he was bored watching Westerns on TV and smoking grass all day (Yeah, he still called it grass.) Hank still had something to give and it pleased him to help Morgan. She was about the age of his granddaughter who had disappeared years ago. Hank never stopped believing she would rally back into his life. He figured someone like him might be helping his granddaughter so he wanted to return the favor, even the cosmic score, and perhaps put some extra points on the board.

Hank never asked about Morgan’s homelessness. Some people just can’t go there.

We need to go there.

The Honda could drive approximately a mile before conking out for some reason or another but that was far enough for Morgan. She had established a routine in Empire and was going on a year now in residence.

Morgan parked her domicile on various streets and vacant lots around the Empire District of Coos Bay. She was 27 years old but looked like a teenager, even with a feral countenance that evinced casual methamphetamine use. (Occasionally, she fell overboard and ended up weeding the public flower beds at 7 in the morning. When that happened, she always apologized to the dogs.)

She survived on her Oregon Trail Card, collecting cans and bottles, and running errands for an elderly shut-in named Steve who didn’t drive anymore and had no one to help him. They met when she parked her car in front of his decrepit duplex and they talked about the dogs while sharing a cigarette.

How in the world had had Morgan ended up in Empire living the way she did? We need to know the reasons but they will elude us for this tale.

What matters is that she was still hanging on, caring for two dogs, a tiny black mutt and a speckled Chihuahua.

Was there any hope that Morgan could somehow find a new path?

Yes. This is a tale. Tales must offer hope. That is their prime ingredient and why this writer can’t stop writing them. Maybe they keep him advancing into the story because fiction is the only way he can fathom (somewhat) a tragic failure of government policy-making, collective humanity, and desiccated Christianity.

Halloween approached. Morgan loved Halloween and fashioning weird costumes. She loved candy, especially anything chocolate. She vaguely recalled trick or treat outings as a kid growing up in North Bend. She also recalled being alone.

Morgan stole a pumpkin from the bin outside the grocery store and wedged it up under the back seat and back window. That was the extent of the decorations but displaying that one pumpkin might signify something latent, something buried deep, a return to something happy or normal in childhood that Morgan might later draw upon for motivation.

One never knows what putting up a single decoration for a holiday might do for the person who made the effort or a person who might see it.

It took the writer of this tale most of his adult life to understand that axiom and that’s why he puts up vintage Christmas decorations, and for the first time, was going to display a Jack O Lantern on Halloween AND GIVE OUT CANDY! to anyone who dared to go trick or treating in Empire, a irregularly blighted and sorrowed neighborhood with entire blocks turned spooky and scary by the amiable, avuncular demon known as President Ronald Reagan.

The Halloween forecast called for 42-degrees and stars in the sky. In other words, dry and no Jack O Lanterns with their mildewed grins (that’s a line from Sometimes a Great Notion). In other words, atypical Halloween weather on the Oregon Coast.

Morgan fell asleep in the sedan as darkness descended. The dogs dozed together on the passenger seat.

When she awakened, she saw several trick or treaters pass by. They were in grade school, dressed up as super heroes, and without parental escort, something practically extinct in America anymore, and sadly almost gone from our culture. Let the kids go on their own! Let them develop interior lives! Let them cream some pumpkins on slick streets!

Morgan felt chilled. She exited the Honda, popped the trunk, and rifled through her possessions. In short order she had donned a Bigfoot onsie.

More trick or treaters appeared. They were running with their phones and bags of candy, one tumbled over, jumped back up, laughing.

A suspect great notion walloped Morgan: I’m going trick or treating. I’m taking the dogs. I’m already in costume. Just slip on my red cowboy boots, the glitter-encrusted, Lone Ranger mask, and gold chains! Shit, this is Empire! Residents dress like this all the time! Shit, Empire exudes a perpetual state of Halloween!

She completed the ensemble, rousted the dogs, rigged up tiaras for them, scrounged up a canvas tote bag, and they hit the weird streets.

Where to first?

A dive bar of course! She entered the Silver Dollar Tavern. The joint was almost empty. Death metal blasted through speakers. She approached the bar, locked eyes with a vacant bartender, and said, “Trick or treat!” with panache and a twirling bow.

He wasn’t having any of it. He didn’t look up.

But an old timer sipping something golden-colored in a snifter was certainly having it.

He said, “Treat!” and ordered Morgan a double Drambuie.

She’d never heard of the stuff.

One sip and Morgan was hooked on the dreamy honey liqueur made in Scotland. She drained the rest of snifter in one gulp and felt the glow all the way to her boots. She thanked the old timer. He also bought her a pickled grotesquerie known officially as a Hot Mama sausage. She broke it into three parts and fed herself and the dogs and away they went.

Now where?

Morgan meandered into the neighborhood with the dogs walking on either side of her, unleashed. Some of the most haunted-looking houses weren’t even decorated; they were just being their forlorn, dilapidated and creepy selves. These were recent ruins, and many of them had a half dozen (or more) rusted, rotted RVs, trailers, trucks, boats, buses, ATVs and even forklifts marooned on lawns and yards gone to seed. Yes, it was haunting all right—the boom and bust of rapacious timber capitalism at its finest.

At first Morgan hit every house that displayed decorations, but she soon developed a preference for the simple Jack O Lantern or lone skeleton dangling from a noose. No rotund inflatables or stringy cobwebs for her.

The candy haul proved pedestrian, but is was free! Morgan received plenty of compliments about her costume and she always responded the same way, “Oh, I wear this all the time.” Which was true.

After an hour, the dogs tuckered out. Morgan stashed the Chihuahua in the tote and headed back toward the Honda.

A couple blocks from her domicile, she saw a small house with three monster Jack O Lanterns flickering on the patio. Each pumpkin had one word carved in it. From left to right: ROCK IS DEAD.

She knocked on the front door. Nothing. She knocked again. An older, semi long-haired man holding a husky by the collar opened the door. The man wore an absurd gray sweater with HAPPY HALLOWEEN stenciled in orange across the chest. The husky wore a black dunce cap and greeted Morgan with his signature howl.

The man produced a plastic Jack O Lantern full of Mounds and Almond Joy candy bars. He instantly recognized Morgan as the homeless woman who lived out of a sedan in Empire. He passed by her almost daily on his morning walk with the husky to a Coos Bay beach and wanted to know her story, particularly after observing her performing her meth-fueled landscaping, but they’d never met, never made eye contact.

Now here she was, and obviously coherent, smiling even. Now was the time to go there.

“Take as many as you want,” said the man.

Morgan grabbed a fistful and placed them in her tote.

“Thank you!” she said. She didn’t ask about the ROCK IS DEAD Jack O Lanterns. By this point in her life, in her struggle to survive, she had lost all curiosity about everything except repairing her car.

The man knew this was the time to go there—get the damn story, lay the first block of the foundation. He might not get another chance to help her into housing, as he had done for other homeless people back when he lived in Portland.

“Love the costume,” said the man, “and the dogs.”

Yes, dogs! That’s the entry point into many people’s hearts. He knew this especially to be true for homeless people with dogs.

“Yeah, they’re a lot of fun,” said Morgan. She turned and walked away. The man watched them disappear around his cedar tree.

He hadn’t gone there. He’d blown it.

That’s hardly a satisfactory to a Halloween tale about a young homeless woman in Empire.

But this tale is not about the man, it is about Morgan, and how she got off her ass and went trick or treating on Halloween with her dogs, and moved into the regular world, if only for one night.

Movement portends hope. Movement can sometimes be seen, then acted upon. The man had seen the movement in Morgan, and that might be the beginning.

October 27, 2025

Oregon Tavern Age: Turds

Matt Love NSP Meditations, Oregon Tavern Age

A Monday afternoon. Sunshine ruled Coos Bay. I sat in my local OTA joint drinking a Gold Beach ale.

The scuttlebutt at the bar centered around the the feral young homeless woman who frequently improvised (meth fueled) landscaping that amounted to ripping out the foliage of public flower beds. The cops had finally arrested her and well, the weeds and wildflowers of Empire were safe for a couple of months.

I also heard an OTA man tell an OTA woman the story of him falling out the back of a pickup truck when he was drunk in the 80s. He had a metal plate installed in his head and it always fucked up the detectors at the airport. It also made his face susceptible to changes when the barometer fell.

Across the room four OTA men swapped tales of either dropping a turd in a swimming pool or encountering a turd in a swimming pool in the 70s. There was also robust laughter about the Baby Ruth floating in the country club pool in Caddyshack. One of the OTAs had pulled the same stunt at a Christian youth group outing to a private pool. (No baptism that afternoon!)

How they initiated this absurd conversation was as lost to history as the origins of the Universe. Maybe the cosmos is one big turd dropped by the Creator. That makes more sense than Genesis.

One of the men said the jolly memory from his youth made him feel like dropping another turd in a public pool. Hello, North Bend Municipal Swimming Pool during senior swim time!

October 20, 2025

A Favor for Elmer

Matt Love NSP Meditations

Dad’s probate period dragged on and on. I had performed my duties as his personal representative with alacrity and scrupulous efficiency.

It hasn’t been enough for one of the beneficiaries. I won’t go into any detail here, but delays and delays orchestrated by an immature, entitled and delusional person had left me in an occasional state of deep depression.

Thank Christ I had Elmer the maniacal husky to me off my ass and onto the beaches or into the woods. Out in nature with my great dog at my side,I always get my head right with the world and launch myself into the day with good vibrations.

A week or so ago, I was feeling extraordinarily blue, waylaid on the couch, trying to read a novel while rain ripped outside.

Elmer came up to me and gave me a look. He barked and pulled the blanket off me with his teeth! Get off your ass!

I laughed, sprung up, jumped into the car, raced to the grocery store, and bought Elmer a big New York steak. I raced home, fried the steak while Elmer stalked the kitchen, cut it up, and served my incredible dog his dinner.

Just like that, depression defeated.

As Jim Harrison wrote, “There’s something about doing a favor for a dog that calms a person down.”

Jim Harrison wrote many a memorable true line in his fiction and nonfiction, but that is the truest.

October 16, 2025

Recent Scenes of Homelessness Around Coos Bay

Matt Love Coos Bay, NSP Meditations

A homeless man clammed in the mudflats as he listened to country music on his phone. He stored his clams in a margarine container.

A homeless woman picked and ate blackberries from a ditch.

A young homeless man with the classic gentile look of Jesus from the Bible storybooks of my youth walked in the gravel shoulder of the Cape Arago Highway at seven in the morning. He was naked.

A homeless man staggering drunk in the dunes of Bastendorff Beach sprayed red paint in the shape of hearts in the sand and rocks. He then hurled the can into the trees and drove away in a 60-year-old truck. Later he rifled through my unlocked car and stole my favorite Leatherman tool.

A homeless woman in a parking lot dueled an imaginary foe with an imaginary sword.

A homeless man walked into a dive bar wearing nothing except cut-off shorts and a white motorcycle helmet. Before he was kicked out he managed to lose one dollar on a slot machine.

A homeless man in his 70s or 80s living out of his dilapidated sedan at the boat ramp can barely stand, let alone walk when he is out of his vehicle. His sedan is distinguished by a Trump 2024 sticker. Every morning he brews coffee on a camp stove in his trunk while classic rock plays on his phone. He seems to prefer Black Sabbath to any other band. He also uses a smart phone and two tablets inside his sedan.

An elderly man walked his pit bull, bicycle and trailer piled high with belongings across the McCullough Bridge.

A young homeless woman has been living out of her sedan for three months. She has a black dog and white cat with her.

A young homeless woman wearing a pink hoodie and carrying a skateboard meandered through the tidal mud flats at 6:30 in the morning.

A homeless woman emerged from a thicket of blackberries and screamed as she walked up a hill carrying a sleeping bag.

A homeless man rode a kid’s bicycle while carrying a bag of wiffle balls.

A young homeless man heaved rocks and dragged a large driftlog into Coos Bay.

More and more of the homeless men in their 40s and 50s have taken to wearing sportswear from the 90s, such as baggy Michael Jordan shorts and Starter jackets.

A homeless man rode an electric bicycle with all his possessions, including three fishing poles, strapped to a rack.

An elderly homeless man found a garden hose and a spigot with running water in front of an abandoned building complex. He was bathing himself and completely nude.

At the boat ramp, a homeless woman wearing a holstered Bowie knife, sparkle jeans and white-rimmed sunglasses yelled profane insults to her mother who was not there.

A homeless man and woman screamed profanities at each other on a sidewalk at 6:30 in the morning.

An elderly homeless man shopped in a grocery store. He wore a leather vest with nothing underneath.

An elderly homeless man sporting an eye patch and wielding a fancy cane asked an employee of a grocery store where the sunglasses were. He had a tattoo of a buxom and naked woman on his left arm.

A homeless woman wore a black knee-high sock on one leg and a white one on the other. A day later she wore a Robin Hood outfit.

A police officer walked into the fog and willows to investigate the homeless encampment adjacent to the boat ramp.

Two homeless men flew an Avengers kite on a Coos Bay beach.

A homeless woman wearing ripped black fishnet stockings carried a skateboard through the mud flats.

A homeless woman asked me for ibuprofen.

A homeless woman with her head under the hood of her sedan wielded a monkey wrench to repair something wrong with the battery.

A young homeless couple stood outside their 80s minivan. Most of its windows were duct taped with cardboard. They fight. She held a baby. She screamed at him to quit spitting on her.

Two homeless men transported a dryer down the middle of the street on an improvised device. It was 6:30 in the morning.

A homeless man carried two pizza boxes over his shoulder as he rode an e-bike to an encampment.

Two men living in a 40-year-old minivan stranded at the boat ramp posted signs on the windshield asking for brake fluid.

A house in the neighborhood started allowing homeless people to pitch tents and string tarps in the front and back yards.

A homeless couple in their 70s searched for cans and bottles on the bay beach.

A young homeless couple conducted a photo shoot with their dogs and wildflowers.

A homeless man rides his e-bike to a cove in Charleston where he fishes almost every day.

A young homeless woman did something inexplicable in a flower bed at seven in the morning, weeding perhaps?

A homeless man fished for trout in a lake in a city park.

A homeless man sat inside a 60-year-old pick up truck in a city park. He was listening to a podcast. The door was ajar. He was naked.

An addled homeless woman at the boat ramp asked me what kind of dog Elmer was. I told her. She said, “Oh you speak Alaska husky! No! That’s so cool.” I laughed and Elmer and I walked away.

A young homeless man slumped on bench outside a dive bar nodded off in a fentanyl stupor. It was raining hard.

A homeless woman weaved across the sidewalk wearing a zebra onesie.

A Metallica three-disc CD anthology washed ashore in front of a Coos Bay homeless encampment.

October 13, 2025

Contemplations of a Dog

Matt Love Coos Bay, NSP Meditations, Oregon Beaches

In the past two months, Elmer the husky has exhibited fascinating new behavior regarding the ocean. I would characterize it as contemplation and it’s like nothing I’ve ever seen in the thousands upon thousands of visits to Oregon’s socialist ocean beaches with dogs.

It wasn’t like this at first. Initially, Elmer would investigate the wrack line for its strange smells and rarely venture down with me to the incoming tide where I walked or ran.

That changed. He now approaches the water, considers it, darts in around the dying waves, goes berserk, becomes calm, backs out, dashes back in, and all the while taking no notice of me. It seems more than just mere play and it has delighted me to speculate what he is thinking about.

You wonder why more humans don’t interact with the ocean this way.

I copied Elmer’s ocean antics a few times in recent weeks, once when multitudes of brown pelicans dive bombed green waves 50 yard offshore.

It is interesting to note that when I did, I completely purged my mind of pressing matters. For those moments, I was free of concerns, just running, splashing, and romping with my great, great dog.

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Teacher of the Year: A Novella

By Matt Love

A reluctant teacher becomes advisor to a moribund high school newspaper. He meets the new editor, a dynamic 18-year-old senior, and together they begin a unique creative collaboration that revives the publication and slowly slides into gray areas. As the poet Octavio Paz wrote, “To realize itself, love must violate the rules of our world...committed by two stars that break out of the conception of love, which implies breaking away and a catastrophe..."

Teacher of the Year
Amazon's Kindle Edition $6.99

Teacher of the Year unfolds in an energetic mixture of epistle, stream-of-consciousness, narrative and meditations on the craft and alchemy of teaching. There is no other more authentic literary exploration into the agonies and ecstasies of teaching in the annals of American literature than this novella.


A Substantial but Incomplete Autobiography in Poems

By Matt Love

In perhaps the largest, most eclectic volume of previously unpublished poetry in the history of Pacific Northwest literature, Matt Love presents 148 poems written over a 30-year span.

As he writes in the introduction to A Substantial but Incomplete Autobiography in Poems, “I have organized this collection into six categories: Ocean, Love, My Life, Oregon Tavern Age, Homelessness, Probation. These poems serve as a substantial but incomplete autobiography.”

“Confessionals, odes, scatological doggerel, polemics, tankas, haiku, prose, psalms, requiems, observations, love letters, lamentations, lyrics, stream of consciousness, meditations, lists, riffs, a eulogy, a sermon, a commencement speech, found poetry, tributes, elegies. I threw it all into an ancient cement mixer and hand cranked that concrete beast while watching blue herons undulate overhead and drinking red wine as the husky snoozed in his dirt fort. The result: A Substantial but Incomplete Autobiography in Poems, something merging where Charles Bukowski, Richard Hugo, Mary Oliver and Liz Phair blend together.”

None of Love's poems were ever submitted to poetry journals, contests or magazines, making this collection a true renegade project of passion and readable to any denizen of a coastal dive bar.

A Substantial but Incomplete Autobiography in Poems

Print Edition

$21.99 + $4 Shipping


Amazon's Kindle Edition $7.99 (Free if you have Kindle Unlimited)

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